girl scout cookies
I’m poppish and I know it.
*Ugh, new Hunger Games. I can’t wait for this movie. I am a nerd for this movie. I already have tickets to a showing (no, not midnight – I’m nerdy, but I’m also old). A spot aired on TV last night and, being a fan of the book, I have immediate reservations about it. Yes, I’m one of those asses that has problems when a movie doesn’t follow the book, i.e. the opening 4 seconds of this new trailer. Still excited, though. I’m mostly faux indignant. I do love the newest clip I’ve posted below the District 12 focused trailer.
*Speaking of The Hunger Games, a new report shows that even though the movie based on the young adult novel of the same name doesn’t come out for another three weeks, it may already be more popular that Twilight. I’m assuming it’s because The Hunger Games isn’t crap. …Did I mention I already have my tickets? [Blastr]
* Do I care about Top Chef? Not really. You see, living in Austin means I have access to more restaurants, and tattoo parlors, per capita than any other American city. I’ve been lucky enough to go to Uchiko a number of times. Their social hour is fantastic, the $6 Ham & Eggs of katsu pork belly served with yolk custard and espelette is amazing. This doesn’t even touch on their fish caramel sauce and maguro sashimi paired with goat cheese, fuji apple, pumpkin seed oil, and black pepper. It’s an incredible delight to sit there for hours tasting a million different things that you never dreamed were possible. So it was no surprise to me that Uchikos head creator, Paul Qui, won Top Chef recently. He may have “…felt pressure to win”, but that’s probably because everyone in Austin expected him to do so. [TV Guide]
*Wish there was a way for those Girl Scout Cookies to stick to your ass even faster? Well, yearn no more: You can soon get Girl Scout Cookie CHOCOLATE BARS! How about a Thin Mint Crunch Bar? No? Well, personally I’m holding out hope for a Samoa Reese’s cup. I’d call it a Katie Cookie FatAss Chunk. It would be awesome! Apparently the Thin Mint Crunch will be available in June. And who’s spreading this rumor, you might wonder? Why none other than the Girl Scouts of America themselves! [HuffingtonPost]
* You can take the Lindsey Lohan out of a train wreck, but you can’t take the train wreck out of the Lohan. I think that’s just about the nicest way I could word that. And, just for the record, I loved Mean Girls. In an attempt to ‘slum it’, Matt Lauer interviewed Lohan on the Today show. And in an attempt at a ‘come back’, Lohan…tried to have a coherent conversation. Ugh. It’s rough to watch and her hair only adds to the sad situation she’s in. [BuzzFeed]
* I want to live in Middle Earth the same way I want to work at Hogwarts. I’ll happily take being employed at a museum while living in New Zealand in exchange for that which does not exist. And this has absolutely nothing to do with Peter Jackson’s newest video production diary entry about The Hobbit! Is it me or is Andy Serkis getting kind of hot? Jackson is currently working on Part II of The Hobbit, no spoilers of which we’re able to see in the video. Many of the dwarves discuss their experiences and you get to see Hobbiton, which is beautiful beyond imagination, but you don’t really want to read me talking about it – you’d much rather watch it, right? See below.
* It’s about damn time: Johnny Depp is finally working on The Lone Ranger. The film will be coming to us from Walt Disney Studios and also stars – surprise, surprise – Helena Bonham Carter. I know: because we’ve all wondered what it would be like to see Depp and Bonham Carter in a film together and now we’ll finally get the chance. Depp will be Tonto to Armie Hammer’s John Reid, and Ranger will hit theaters in May 2013. [USAToday]
* Global warming is upon us. Our presidential candidates are an all new low of human scum. It is a leap year and the year the Mayans believed the world would end. But more than anything else, 2012 will be known as The Year of the CumberbaTch. He was Sherlock, he will be Smaug, and he’s currently portraying the new Star Trek villain. That’s not to mention War Horse and Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy, both of which were up for Academy Awards. No, there’s nothing that Brit can’t do apparently. Oh, wait. He can’t keep his mouth shut. In a recent interview with MTV, CumberbaTch notes that he couldn’t stop giggling while on The Hobbit set. He’s just such good besties with Martin Freeman, who portrays both Watson and Bilbo, that his pal’s hobbit get up kept causing the confident Englishman to burst into laughter. Very mature. A brief excerpt of the interview is below. [MTV]
* COMIC CON BADGES GO ON SALE THIS WEEKEND! Every year I get soooo excited for this. And every year I don’t go. I’ve never been to a Con and I feel sad and pathetic for it. I don’t know if I even truly want to go to SDCC at this point; it’s massively popular meaning there are too many people for too small a space, Hollywood has stepped in to make it less Comic-focussed and more Con-the-people-esque. Maybe I’ll drag my ass to Dragon Con one day, but I will always dream of SDCC before and after. Doesn’t really seem fair to DC, huh? [LATimes]
* Artist/Genius Igor Kieryluk decided to take it upon himself to imagine what the characters of Batman would look like if they were active during the Renaissance. Just check out Two Face below. [BuzzFeed]
Photo credit BuzzFeed
* Yet another ‘Worst Idea Ever’ is coming out of that stink pit known as Hollywood. A remake of National Lampoon’s Vacation is heading back to the big screen in the form of a remake. I couldn’t care less about this, so I’m ending it here: LAME. [DenOfGeek]
* Speaking of Hollywood, Netflix’s contract with Starz is coming to and end. Roughly translated this means that you have one week left to watch anything in your queue that’s a Starz feature. More than 800 titles will be soon to leave Netflix, so get off your ass and…and go sit on it, to watch some good family fun before it’s unavailable. Starz and Netflix were unable to reach a deal regarding pricing. Awesome. [SlashFilm]
* I once made my father an apron of questionable taste, as ironed onto it were the words “Heil to the Chef”. But aprons don’t have to just be plain or funny. They can also be hot as hell, as proven by Etsy store Nerd Alert. Love2Right came up with fantastically themed aprons including Harry Potter, Portal, and Super Heroes – oh, so many Super Heroes! My personal favorites are Wolverine and the Link aprons, but the S-Mart one is pretty great, too! By far the best thing about these aprons? They’re super affordable! [GeeksAreSexy]
* I have to tell you: Rush Limbaugh is an idiot. I’ve written about it, sure, but let it be know he is a stupid, stupid man. Birth control has nothing to do with prostitution, is not prostitution, and a man who confuses the two has no place in any role of authority or power. Just the latest news in his long term goal of proving himself a Class-A Moron. [BuzzFeed]
* And, finally, Tim Burton’s Frankenweenie trailer has finally hit the web. Both the new trailer AND the original 1984 movie in its entirety are below. Enjoy.
This entry was posted in Comedy, Entertainment, Humor, news, Pop Culture, Technology, Uncategorized and tagged apron, batman, benedict cumberbatch, birth control, candy bar, clip, comic con, diary 6, Frankenweenie, geek, girl scout cookies, hobbit, hunger games, johnny depp, katniss, limbaugh, Lindsey Lohan, lone ranger, nerd, new video, paul qui, peter jackson, prostitution, super hero, tickets, tim burton, today show, top chef, trailer, uchiko, video.
Tomorrow I’ll be attempting Fish & Chips over Sherlock.
Today, it’s Pop Day.
*JK Rowling has yet to put down her pen. It’s not all teenagers and inappropriate wand use this time around, however, as the Novelist will be writing specifically for adults. Most of the fans of Harry Potter that I know are well older than 18 years of age, so I’m very excited to read what mature further adventures. [PublishersWeekly]
* Speaking of SNL, for the first time since I can remember the musical guest will actually be way cooler than the celebrity host: Jack White will be playing while Lindsey Lohan is “acting”. Not exactly sure why Lorne Micheals would have her on; between her million arrests and Playboy cover she hasn’t been able to get any actual movie work in a long, long time. [TheHollywoodReporter]
* Hey! You know who’s cooler than you? Stephen Hawking. I mean that goes without saying to begin with, but when was the last time you had to members of the opposite sex gyrating good times all over your person? [RadarOnline]
* Remember when George on Seinfeld wanted to be called T-Bone? Remember how he worked for Mr. Kruger at the time? Actor Daniel von Bargen, who played Kruger on the incredibly successful sitcom, attempted suicide earlier this week by shooting himself in the head. According to the 911 dispatch call, Bargen attempted suicide after becoming distraught over possibility of having toes amputated due to diabetes complications. He has survived the shooting, however, is in critical condition. [NYDailyNews]
* Last year I had friends over for an Oscar watch party and I made Oscar themed cupcakes. There was a funfetti style for The Social Network, a cupcake cut apart into pieces and layers and put back together with icing for Inception, a dark chocolate cake and ultra pure white icing for Black Swan, the list goes on. This year I’m having friends over, but I couldn’t care less about any of the movies up for awards. No film really blew my skirt up this year and any of the ones that came close weren’t even nominated. The Academy really screwed up this year, but sports fans have their Super Bowl and ladies have their Oscars. So one dedicated fan decided to make 2012 Oscar Nominee inspired hotdogs. And I’m so starving from being on freakin’ Weight Watchers points that I’d eat them all. Right now. [BuzzFeed]
* Speaking of crap that you can eat, YumSugar has a Girl Scout cookie quiz. Think you know ’em? Take the test and find out. Me, I can’t. Even answering questions about cookies will add fat to my ass. [YumSugar]
* And, finally, I can sing every word of the soundtrack and I can recite every word of the script. I make constant references to this movie, primarily in terms of David Bowie’s package (you should now know what I’m talking about if you read this blog regularly), and I even know which voice actors did which character in this and everything else Jim Henson. So let’s watch Jennifer Connelly’s audition for the lead character of Sarah, shall we? [DangerousMinds]
This entry was posted in Art, Comedy, Entertainment, Humor, news, Politics, Pop Culture, Uncategorized and tagged academy awards, girl scout cookies, jennifer connelly, jk rowling, labyrinth, new novel, oscars, seinfeld, sex, snl, stefon, stephen hawking, suicide.
* I just about hate myself for being so interested in this, but it’s true: I am morbidly attracted to what is claimed to be Jack the Ripper’s autobiography. Do I think it’s the real thing? No, but that’s just as much out of safety as out of common sense. If it is real that would be horrifying on top of being highly unlikely. This first-person account of Ripper’s exploits was rediscovered in 2008 and was apparently written in 1920. Children’s author Sydney George Hulme Beaman is said to have been left the autobiography by an acquaintance named James Carnac, and Beaman claims to have omitted the most disturbing portions prior to submitting it for publishing. No, honestly, I don’t think any of writings will have come from Jack himself. Sereal killers are generally proud of their work, but this strikes me as too similar to those who claimed to be Billy the Kid after his death. All public knowledge, attention whoring, and no direct blood lines. I do, however, believe “The Autobiography of James Carnac” is going to be a very interesting and dark read. [History.com]
Original handmade manuscript of supposed Jack the Ripper autobiography, made to look like bloodied cobblestones.
Photo credit History.com via Montacute Museum
*Apparently even Doctor Who can have heart attacks. I just didn’t know his current incarnation was Italian. A man in Verona, Italy suffered a heart attack recently. Having recently been the receiver of a heterotopic transplant, the 71-year-old Italian suffering from low blood pressure and shortness of breath had two hearts. Medical Science is both amazing and horrifying. [MSNBC]
*Speaking of Doctor Who, Steven Moffat is out fueling the rumor mills yet again! It’s no secret that Steven Moffat is one of my favorite story writers every, especially in the realm of television. In a recent interview with the Radio Times, Moffat casually mentioned that season 7 would feature “…at least” 14 episodes! Be still my beating heart! [Radio Times]
*UGO.com has compiled a list of the best Archer jokes. To me, this is simply an impossibility. Archer is so sick, so wonderful, so perfectly my kind of humor, that a list of the best jokes comes off as trivial and pointless. Be that as it may, a new season of Archer is thankfully here, debuting last night at 10pm on FX. The first three episodes of the season teased fans way back in September as a three parter titled The Arch of Darkness. This series is planned to be the longest yet, at a total of 16 episodes. As I don’t have cable, ’cause I’m no bitch to Time Warner, I merely purchase the shows the day after they air for $2 on iTunes. If you haven’t tuned in to Archer, one of the two fantastic animated shows H. Jon Benjamin currently stars in, you can catch the first two seasons on Netflix Streaming. Get on that.[UGO]
* When I was a mere 16 years old, I worked for Priceline Corporate. It was ridiculous. And awesome. And when there were company parties held in rented out airplane hangars, William Shatner would be there
surrounded by a billion bodyguards. But, alas, his time with Priceline is no more. But rather than merely ending his contract, Priceline plans on killing off his character. Smooth. [AdRants]
* It’s that time of year again. You know, when you’re just trying to get your body back into shape after the holidays and all of a sudden – BAM! The Girl Scouts of America come along with their awesome cookies and screw everything up. And because we live in the land of Insto-Gratifiction there is now an app for that. What I’m saying is iPhone owners (that’s like, I dunno, roughly 6 billion of us, right?) can download a free GS Cookie locator app. It’s just too bad you can’t order cookies from your phone. But then, it’d probably be fastest if I could just download all those calories straight to my ass. Because that’s exactly where they’re going to go. [GeekSugar]
* DC Comics has revealed a new logo. Personally, I’m not sure if it was a necessary change, but I might just be a cermudgeon. And I get what they’re doing with the new logo. It’s simple and obvious, and, really, not that bad. Or that different. So kudos to them. The “explanation”, however, of such an obvious meaning seems a bit unnecessary. [MTVGeek]
* Jeff Goldblum’s appearance on Glee might be the only reason I have to watch it. Seriously, I’ve tried. I’m just not into it. I am, however, totally in love with Goldblum and him playing a gay dad? My God, it’s like the role he was born to play. Seriously. [TVGuide.com]
* I could see Judy Garland in Inception. She could put all those strung out high disillusions to good use. Too soon? Nah. Peter Stults, an artist inspired by John Hartter, reimagined recent movies to feature classic stars, putting a very vintage spin on their promo posters. [BuzzFeed]
Photo credit BuzzFeed via Behance.net
This entry was posted in Comedy, Entertainment, Humor, news, Pop Culture, Uncategorized and tagged app, archer, autobiography jack the ripper, cookie locator, dc comics, doctor who, girl scout cookies, glee, james carnac, jeff goldblum, new logo, priceline, steven moffat, surgery, william shatner.