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Thank Pop it’s Friday: Star Wars guitar, Dr. Who, A Dad Shoots the Internet + More!

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Let’s do this. And then let’s get some sushi.

*Shamrock shakes are back at McDonald’s and are now available at every location. Run out and get one, and get fat…ter. According to USA Today

“The Shamrock Shake weighs in at 540 calories and 16 grams of fat for a small, or 840 calories and 24 grams of fat for a large…”

Awesome. [USA Today]

* A daughter wasn’t supposed to use Facebook and she certainly wasn’t supposed to talk shit about her father while using the social networking site. What’s a parent to do? Well, according to her father, Tommy Jordan, the answer is to murder the laptop. But before you go believing he’s an abusive mad man, Jordan makes an 8 minute video case to his daughter explaining the actions – and where she went wrong. There’s a difference between freedom of speech and a punk, spoiled brat. I’m all for tough love. Unless the daughter worked a part time after school job to purchase that laptop herself, I certainly don’t feel this is any form of abuse. She broke the rules, and I know that if my parents merely took my laptop away and hid it, that I would find it. Nice. [MSNBC]

* So, a few months ago, somebody posted on a Civil War era photo on eBay. The seller pointed out how much the gentleman in said photo resembled Nicholas Cage…and then speculated on the possibility that Cage was, in fact, a vampire. Because apparently vampires can either have sparkly skin or a massively receding hairline. Anyway, in an attempt to stay relevant, Cage brought up this photo while on The Late Show with David Letterman last night. And, no, starring in the next skull-on-fire movie thing isn’t keeping him relevant. [Blastr]

* Every Best Of… List always lacks something, and this tournament for the Best Sitcom Episode Ever is no different. Splitsider is giving fans the opportunity to vote for their favorite of all time, but be prepared to be disappointed. Also, be prepared to totally want to go watch some 80’s and 90’s tv after reading through their list – ooooh, Marge vs The Monorail – Classic! [Splitsider]

* Amy and Rory are leaving us. It’s not up for discussions; it simply has to be accepted. But I am not up for Moffat to tease us with the possibility of a new sidekick. I really liked Rory and Amy, just as I really liked Rose Tyler. If he continues to go through companions like popcorn, we’re going to have to change the The Doctor’s name to the Space Whore. In regards to the Doctor’s 50th anniversary Moffat states “There will be shocks, surprises and heartbreak—the Doctor is about to say goodbye to his very best friends, Amy and Rory…And then he’s about to say hello to someone very different.” Oh, Moffat. This I don’t need. [Blastr]

* I don’t need any more of a complex. I am a chubby-lady-geek. I wear that badge with pride and a crap ton of girly insecurity. It’s what I do, it’s my thing. So, the dude who totally photoshopped classic works of art to have the women featured appear thinner as today’s standards? Oh, he is just begging for me to key his car. Which I imagine is a Douche Mobile. [The Gloss]

* I don’t want an XBox 360. I don’t. I mean, a PS3 makes much more sense…So stop trying to woo me, Lucas Arts! A c3po/Artoo special edition Kinect?! EVIL! [MTV Geek]

* Speaking of Star Wars, a dude made a custom Millennium Falcon guitar. It totally shreds and dodges asteroids. But the coolest thing about it? The little bit are R2-D2 detailin’. Bad Ass to the max! [GeekIsAwesome]

* And, finally, this happened:

Photo credit Blastr

Thank you, and good night!

Be sure to follow me on Twitter @ChicGeekDaily !

David Cross + Warhol + Jack White + More

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*David Cross is coming to Austin tomorrow. If you’re just finding this out now, I should tell you: you’ve got no chance to see him. On Monday the Alamo Drafthouse announced David Cross would be hosting a marathon of The Increasingly Poor Decisions of Todd Margaret. Tickets went on sale on Wednesday and sold out in 8 minutes.

I highly recommend catching Poor Decisions when you can. It airs on IFC and, like Portlandia, it’s not your usual comedy. It’s quite refreshing in a How-I-Met-Your-Mother-2-And-A-Half-Crappy world.

*Andy Warhol, a hero to the Hipster Movement everywhere, just got extra hipstery. You can now carry your MacBookAir or iPad around in his face. No, nothing is sacred, thanks for asking. [Incase]

* Andy Serkis deserves an Oscar! I’m not the only one who thinks so; Fox has launched a campaign with quite the emotionally moving ad in an attempt to get the man some well deserved gold. [Blastr]

* Jack White is collaborating with Tom Jones. That makes sense. No, really, I bet it will be an incredible work. Jack White is an amazing guitarist and song writer and Tom Jones is classic and has stood the test of time…it’s just every time I see Jack White all I can think is “You slept with Renee Zellweger,” and that grosses me out. [24Bit]

* “And in other news, I love Lamp,” actually happened live on the news.

 

On the Sixth Day of Geekmas, Chic Geek Daily Gave to Thee…

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On the Sixth Day of Geekmas, Chic Geek Daily Gave to Thee…

Six Evil Ninja Jedi’s.

On the fifth day of Geekmas, Chic Geek Daily Gave to Thee…

Five misfit Toys! (Okay, there’s more than 5, but those are just bonuses.)

On the fourth day of Christmas, Chic Geek Daily gave to thee…

Four Ewoks hiding in amongst the trees [TheDailyWhat]:

—–

On the third day of Geekmas, Chic Geek recommended to thee…

Three Maru’s in the mirror. Watch out – He’ll cut you!

On the Second Day of Geekmas Chic Geek endorsed to thee…

Two Wookie mating calls done on TV.

* Following from Wednesday’s Pop Bytes Post

On the First Day of Geekmas Chic Geek endorsed to thee…nothing. Because I wasn’t on the ball. But here’s this to make up for it.

One Bird singing the Mario Brothers Theme.

Cable Television Needs to be Sent to the Glue Factory

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I don’t have cable television. And I don’t miss it.

Everything I want to watch can be seen through AirPlay on my Apple TV or with an HDMI cable through my laptop to my television. This doesn’t mean I don’t want more. This simply means I’m not willing to sell my soul each month to Time Warner, Cablevision, Comcast, or any other television content fister.

Cable an’ iPhone sitting in a tree, could me making some money right from me…

Here in Austin the vast majority of people I know do not have cable. Less then 10% of our friends and coworkers pay for television channels. In fact, I have a single coworker that I know of that has cable. Most of us depend on live streaming Netflix at a whopping $15.62 a month, PBS through an antenna, and books. Hulu has a certain allure for NBC and Fox television shows, but even their online content contains more and more advertisements – the exact reason many of us dropped cable service in the first place. And I’m going to simply glaze over the recent indiscretions of Netflix, what with upping their rates and QuicksterGate, etc. The $15 a month I’m paying Netflix right now is more than worth their service to me. I’m over their past mistakes.

Once I counted up the friends and contacts I have without cable I discovered a correlation to the iPhone: Every single person I knew without cable had an iPhone. We vary in age from 25 to 40, and vary widely in nationality and race. Some have children, some refuse to even touch kids. I work for a mobile company, one friend a social worker, one friend an anesthesiologist, another three movie and comic book artists, most college educated, some not, some beyond an undergraduate degree. What I’m saying is that the group I looked at has differences, but what it came down to was that we hate ads shouting at us, telling what meds we should be on, and we have to pay for that harassment.

It’s certainly an interesting coincidence. Or maybe our attention spans are so shot do to über short television programs that are then fragmented by ads that our multitasking and high strung brains now need to replace one form of technology for another because it’s simply the only way we now know how to function.

I don’t regret giving up cable at all. Most days I find myself thankful I have no idea what the Didgeridoo with the Stars shows are that I hear about on the radio and from the coworker I know with cable. This does not mean that there aren’t shows that I would certainly like to see, however. It just means I’m tired of paying thousands a year when what I want to watch is probably valued at $5 a month.

I hate cable for that reason. But I do blindly love my iPhone. The iPhone and its entertaining and multitasking capabilities are an indication of our future. I’m paying less then half of what I was paying for cable for my iPhone AND I don’t have to deal with advertisements. I even have Netflix on it, and can send anything to my television through AirPlay on my Apple TV. I watch any show I’ve purchase from iTunes for a dollar or two on the big screen. No ads and I own the few things I’ve purchased forever and ever.

When I am in a household with cable television I generally watch BBCAmerica or PBS. BBCAmerica always winds up being a rather frustrating experience: American cable corporations cut an additional 10 minutes from an hour long BBC program to squeeze in more ads. Simply knowing that I’m getting shorted is immensely irritating. I am “sold at” every second of every day – we all are. By that I mean in some way at almost every moment, something is accosting me with ads, even when it’s through a purchased service such as Pandora or Hulu.  I wanted to watch a program airing from 8pm until 9:30pm one evening a few nights ago while staying with my parents, who have cable. When we hit the “information button” on the remote to get a summary of the show we noticed it’s run time was 53 minutes; there was 37 minutes of advertisements for a 53 minute show, meaning roughly 35% of what we’d be watching – and my parents were paying for – was ads! Fox added 70% airtime of the original length! The constant presence of companies shouting at any and all makes a listener feel intruded upon, violated, and leaves one with a very short fuse. We’re paying exorbitant prices to conglomerates making millions from the advertisements alone that they force upon their loyal customers and it’s simply not worth is any more. Cable stopped being worth its cost years ago.

While Hulu may be the internet’s number one cable programming site, I can’t imagine it will last much longer without changing its business practices. Hulu had two to three ads per show at its inception. In many cases you could opt to watch a  three minute advertisement or trailer and then watch your 22 or 42-minute television program without any break whatsoever. That is no longer the case. Hulu now often has 4 or 5 breaks per 22-minute episode and often those breaks have at least two advertisements. The ironic thing is that Hulu believes people will pay for this spike in advertisements, essentially saying “We here at Hulu are now making more money then ever from ads and on top of it we want to guarantee our multimillion dollar bonuses by making you pay for service you’re technically already paying for.” That service is of course Internet. And I have yet to meet a single person who does pay for Hulu Plus. Even at $8 a month, it is not worth it. The Street summed up HuluPlus in a single short comment perfectly: It costs $9.99 a month and still has commercials? Lame.

I was always ready to chuck something straight at my television every time I was told “This program is brought to you by…” Bitch, please! The programming is brought to me by no one other than yours truly – ME! – for paying my own cable bill.

Issue at hand:

Hulu and the other cable companies could be smart: I would pay $10 a month for advertisement free Hulu that I could play on the internet, my iPhone, Apple TV, or through a game system. I might even pay $15. But there would have to be NO advertisements. I want credit for bringing the program to me, damnit.

If the large cable companies had a single brain between the group of them, they could see a major money making opportunity in front of them – and respond to the major decline in cable subscribers. Make an “App” for mobile devices, cut some losses and rebuild service in the way the public is demanding. They could attempt to appease their clients and at least keep some revenue coming in from consumers.

Unfortunately, for now it seems cable companies are apparently blinded by the massive boner they have for the almighty dollar and would rather keep fees at absurd levels and lose people completely, then work with the consumers wants and needs to keep far more customers around.

I may be a punk, but even I know that hard economic times can often mean the restructuring of how business is done. If cable networks were willing to create a “Pay By Channel” option, I guarantee a flood of ex-customers would come flocking back to their services. And if Hulu dropped the crap ads on top of having to pay a monthly fee, their subscribers would double in number. I would sign up today. But that might mean that some King of Shit Mountain CEO would only get a $29 million bonus this year instead of $30 million. And we just can’t have that.

*A little FYI about Netflix and Quickster: In the 1980’s, when video stores became big business, the government stepped in and said they could not sell the personal information of their clients to outside sales companies. This law remained in affect when Netflix was born; even though it was a ‘dot com’, it was still a movie rental business and therefore couldn’t earn the added income of selling its clients’ information. By splitting into two separate companies, a streaming television group and a movie rental group, Netflix could legally sell all our information, at least on the streaming side of things, which was unprotected. So, kind of a dick move on their part, but, as nauseating as it all is, our personal info is bought and sold every day. Ever been asked for your number in order to purchase something at Bath and Body Works or Radio Shack? Yeah…Just say “No” from now on.

Doctor Wholidays, Edible Star Wars, Dan Rad is Ginsberg (?!) & So Much More!

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*To start: 15 Unseen Characters on TV that we all know and love.

*What does an AT-AT taste like? Gingerbread, apparently. The best quote I’ve read regarding this amazing wintery treat: “That AT-AT is going to make me fat fat.”

*Where’s Waldo: The Feature Film, or The Worst Idea Ever, has gotten a screen writer. Shouldn’t have been too hard to find, since the entire movie will consist of two lines – “Where’s is he?” and “There he is!”

*If you’re reading this then you’re not really doing anything at all. Science deems it so!

*Video of Doctor Who cast members reading bedtime stories. Kind of ironic when you think of the episodes that definitely don’t help you sleep at night – DON’T BLINK! Ugh, but Martha Jones reads one, too. She was my absolute LEAST liked sidekick.

*WHAT THE – OHMYGOD -OH! Just make it stop! JUST MAKE IT STOP! I don’t know if you heard, but there’s this show called Virgin Diaries. A couple thought it would not only be an awesome idea not to have sex until marriage, but to wait to even KISS until their wedding day. And so their first ever kiss – with anyone – is…just awful. And you can watch it on tv! I don’t know what that kid thought he was doing, but the bride and all the guests look like they were *this close* to puking. And keep in mind that that’s just the kiss. As newly weds there are…other…things…they’ll be thinking about doing, and they’ll do it just as well as they did whatever the hell that was. I’m so creeped out right now. I think I need to go make out with some stranger in a bar just to put the stars back in alignment. Take a gander!
*Hey, everybody! London has a giant Lego Christmas Tree with Lego balls and all!
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*You know what makes the Doctor Who Christmas Special even better? A Doctor Who Christmas Special Marathon leading up to it! Whoooot!
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*If someone isn’t already working on a porn adaptation of this, they really, really need to get on the ball.
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*The three brothers Hanson all got married so young and just about immediately started poppin’ out babies. So in an attempt to support those budding families, they’re now selling…beer?
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*”Squeal like a pig! Squeeeeal like a pig!” Yeah, I don’t remember that guys name either, the actor or character, but it should be noted that he’s passed away. Must be one of the most quoted lines ever, next to “You got a real pretty mouth.” I say that one to my friends all the time.
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*There’s one thing that really super bothers me about Daniel Day Lewis playing Abraham Lincoln in an upcoming film: He looks more like Abraham Lincoln than Abe did. He’s going to be the first person to get an Oscar for a movie that hasn’t even come out yet.
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*So, Daniel Radcliffe is set to play Allen Ginsberg. After seeing the Harryest part of the Potter in Equus, I don’t question any of his roles any more. I’m sure he’ll do hung – WELL! I meant, I’m sure he’ll do well.
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*J.J. Abrams has decided to create a new female role for the Star Trek sequel. Some how I’m far more okay with this than when Peter Jackson created a new female role for The Hobbit. Is it necessary? We’ll have to see it to know for sure and, let’s face it, we’re all going to see it.
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*Can’t afford the $120+ Lego Millennium Falcon for your loved one (I sure as hell can’t!). Try one of these Do It Yourself Star Wars gifts! Love them alllllllllll.
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And I’m spent.

Last minute Friday PopExtras!

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The holidays are upon us and, man, Capitalism really wants to drive that home.

* For the 1% geeks in your life, or those rich enough to shop for them, Blastr has released a list of psychotically expensive Holiday gifts. Yes, I am jealous. Thanks for asking.

 

* Target isn’t showing any signs of backing down from their 11pm Thanksgiving Day shift start time for employees. Evil? Yes. But their commercials star one of my favorite comedians: Maria Bamford.

 

* There will be a RIDICULOUS amount of TV marathons on the Boob Tube this coming week. Here’s an entire list!

 

* What the WHAT?! Liam Neeson narrates the War of the World on Broadway in London…and does so as a hologram!

 

* Doctor Who (Matt Smith before I’m bombarded with comments) is gettin’ naked for charity. A nude do-gooder? Sign me up!…to stare. ‘Cause staring is free, right? I have no money.

 

* Finally: someone has caught Leonardo DiCaprio dressed as the Great Gatsby! Classsssssy! And he’s slimmed down. Like a young Alec Baldwin, Leo tends to get a little doughy in his down time.